Basically parenting behavior has 4 styles, namely autoritarian, autoritative, permissive (indulgent), and detached (disinganged). Although no single parent consistently holds only one parenting model, all parents follow the tendency to hold only one approach in practicing parenting behavior, and with that framework we can describe the parent-child relationship that occurs within the family.
Parents with an autoritarian style, very rigidly holding rules, they expect absolute adherence from their children. They also hope that children will adopt family values and values without questioning them. Autoritarian parents are very disciplined, often using corporal punishment, and do not give the children the proper love for the purpose of shaping the child’s behavior. Children who grew up with parents like this usually become moody, unhappy, frightened and vulnerable children. They tend to be shy, withdrawn and lack confidence. Indeed, if affection is not expressed in children, they usually become dissident and anti-social.
Parents with an autoritative style show respect and value the opinions of children by letting them be different. Although there are rules in the family, parents open the opportunity to discuss if the child does not understand or disagree with the rules set. Parents make the rules clear to children, although in the end parents are in control as holders of authority, but negotiation and compromise are very likely to be done. Autoritative parents in addition to being responsible also demand. They are firm, but apply discipline with love and affection, and not with strength, they explain the rules and expectations to the children not by force. Parenting capital like this usually produces children who have a high confidence, independent, have a great curiosity, happy, assertive and interactive.
Parents with a permissive (indulgent) style, apply little or no control over the child’s behavior. Even if there are rules in the house, but usually not applied consistently. They also explain the reasons why a rule is set, but allow children to follow it or not. Children learn that they can do whatever they want. Parents of this model are quite responsive but not specifically sued. They have little hope in children and impose inconsistent discipline. Punishment is enforced but not effective because there is no time limit. Children with parents like this usually grow into children who are disrespectful, disobedient, aggressive, irresponsible, and perverted. They feel insecure, because at least guidance can keep their behavior. However, these children are usually creative and spontaneous, although low in social responsibility and independence, but they are happier than children raised by autoritarian parents.
Parents are letting (detached / disenganged), they are unresponsive nor demanding. They do not care and pay no attention to the child’s need for compassion and discipline. Children with parents like this usually experience some difficulties and psychological and behavioral problems compared to other children.
The parenting model is shaped by the historical development of the parent, his education and personality, his son’s behavior, and by the experience and current state of life of the parent. Parental behavior is also influenced by work, marriage, family financial conditions, and other conditions that affect the parental behavior and psychological well-being. In addition, parents of different cultures, from different socioeconomic levels, and from different ethnic groups, raise their children in different ways.